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In the Evening I will Sing His Glory

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  • #2680

    In the evening I will sing His glory;

    When the daily task is done,

    And the disappearing sun

    Signs, and seals in gold, the past days story.

    /

    I will sing His glory, from the shadows;

    As the world sinks into night,

    All is dark, but He is light;

    In His glory, even pain is hallowed.

    /

    I will sing His glory in the twilight,

    Earth grows old and disappears,

    Anguish, doubting, failure, fears;

    God of high noon, God of starless midnight.

    /

    I will sing His glory… all is glory!

    All I am and have, I yield;

    All in Him is cleansed and healed,

    And I’ll bear His likeness in the morning!

    JT

  • #2681

    An old piece of mine. Hymn material? Thoughts or input welcome, as well as music suggestions.

  • #2683

    Signs, and seals in gold, the past day’s story…. beautiful line. I like the feel of this poem… the last line seems to change that though- maybe it’s the presence of the exclamation mark and maybe it’s just me.

    The middle two stanzas seem to be describing the same time as the themes are overlapping. Are you going for chronological order here?

    Overall- lovely piece.

  • #2685

    Thank you, Michelle.

    You raise some good questions. As I said, I wrote this years ago; I think my thought at that time was progression, night getting darker, until the eventual morning when we will bear His likeness. However, I think it might have been one of those poems where the “poem” was basically the first stanza, and everything thereafter was mostly filler material.

    I will try to post a revised version within the next few days.

    James

  • #2698

    Lynn Martin
    Administrator

    I like the form, and could wish the first and last lines of stanzas rhymed better. But if used for a song, that probably makes less of a problem than if this is just a standalone poem.

    The final line of the third stanza feels a bit tacked on. The “all is glory!” exclamation may or may not work out well in a strophic hymn composition. Otherwise, I think this works quite well.

  • #2700

    Following is a modified version of the poem. It calls for slow, deep reading. I aimed for improvement in flow of time, rhyme, and meaning.

    • This reply was modified 1 year, 4 months ago by  James Troyer.
  • #2702

    In the evening I will sing His glory;

    When the daily task is done,

    And the disappearing sun

    Signs, and seals in gold, the past day’s story.

    /

    I will sing His glory from the shadows;

    Earth grows old, and disappears,

    Weary, scarred, and bathed in tears;

    Even pain and toil, His glory hallows.

    /

    Still my soul will sing, while life lies sleeping;

    Resting in love infinite,

    Known by Him who is the Light;

    Held, through starless midnight, in His keeping.

    /

    I will sing His glory through the waiting;

    As our dark orb slips through time

    Toward a rendezvous sublime,

    Toward the greater glory of day’s breaking.

    JT

    • #3129

      I also really enjoy the imagery of the first stanza. This second version does a much better job of showing the passage of time. I will say that the two shorter lines being on the inside goes against the natural flow of hymn tunes. I could sing you something for the first two even three lines, but then returning to a longer line feels strange. That being said, I’m sure someone somewhere could make it work.

      I like the message, and the idea that our souls continue to sing even after death, if I correctly understood what you wanted to communicate. Thank you for sharing this.

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