Hi Vincent, I enjoy this tune. It flows really well in an expressive legato. I do think a few things could improve it, though.
First, there’s not a lot of repetition of musical ideas. Every line is different, and even though they are fairly cohesive, that makes for a lot of musical material to learn as well as not giving it lots of direction.
Also, the harmony could be more solid. Typically, I find that I can get away with chords in unstable inversions best when they are not on a strong beat or a prominent note or when they flow directly from the note before them and to the note after them. There are exceptions, of course, but I don’t think all of the inversions you include are exceptions, such as the IV6 at “eve.” My (uneducated) sense is that these stylistic departures could benefit from more practice of standard harmonization.
Just my thoughts.
